So today I was driving and learned the following little bit about the Nobel Peace Prize on the radio. Apparently the guy who the prize is name after, Alfred Nobel, was the inventor of dynamite. Ironic isn't it. One day, Alred's brother died and the following day the newspaper ran his obituary, however the newspaper was misinformed and thought Alfred died. When Alfred read the newspaper the following morning, he saw his own obituary which claimed that the "merchant of death" had finally died. Extremely upset that this had become his reputation, Alfred Nobel spent the next few years donating millions of dollars towards humanitarian efforts. For his work, the Nobel Peace Prize was name after him.
What would you do if you read your obituary and saw how others viewed your life? Would you be proud of your accomplshments, of your relationships, of your attitudes?
I think many of us are guilty have thinking that we have our whole life ahead of us to make a change and that tomorrow is the perfect day to start. But what about today, what if we received a shock like Alfred and decided to make a difference now. In high school, I made a pact with a good friend that we were going to go and change the world after graduating from college. The more and more I approach that day, the more I realize that there is no need to wait until then, true chage can be made as soon as we begin to put others ahead of ourselves. I think service plays a large role in change.
I have been applying for Disney over the past few weeks (pray for me with that whole process) and I have been looking over interview questions and recently came across the one which asks for you to sum up yourself in three words. What would you choose?
A lot of us also feel like even if we wanted to get new words to describe ourselves, that it would be too hard. We have already built up this personalitly and character which our family and friends are used to. But if the 'merchant of death' was able to change his reputation to one which now universally symbolizes peace, I think there's a shot for the rest of us.
After quite a few weeks of editing and photoshopping, my new website is up and running. Check it out and let me know what you think:
www.personal.psu.edu/sfm5007
www.personal.psu.edu/sfm5007
So the beginning of the school year has started up again and we are already at another season of Penn State football. As the first friday of the Fall semester, tonight was particularly hectic along the streets of state college. For me, I was able to spend part of the night with some good friends and it was good just to relax amidst the busyness outside the apartment complex. As we started talking, we began to recount the stories and instances of how different friends slowly became integrated into our circle; and it got me thinking about leadership.
This semester will mark my first semester as a non designated leader for UCM, the group I am apart of at Penn State. For the past three years, I have spent a good portion of my time working on starting up the group and creating activities that encouraged community-building. At the time, I thought I knew what community-building meant, but tonight made me look a few layers deeper at what the phrase means.
During the years as a "leader" for the group, I was consumed with the details of the organization: making sure there was food for the meetings, updating the website weekly (or more likely monthly), and ensuring that activities were designed to include everyone. And although we as a leadership team talked about the purpose of UCM and why this group was important for people on campus, I never took the time to really understand why.
I've had life pretty easy, and it is something I am extremely grateful for, but at the same time it is something that can set me up for missing the struggles that others have had to deal with in their own lives. I started thinking tonight about what the acronym UCM means for me. In my few years with the group, UCM has represented a leadership oppurtunity, a chance to create environments that bring people together, and a place to laugh. UCM is a place where my friends are, where I can relate to, where I can have fun with others.
However, I have always been UCM. I joined UCM before I was officially a freshman. When I joined the leadership team, there was no prior student UCM group, I was part of forming it out of nothing. Essentially, I was always there, and over the years others seem to gravitate to the group and become integrated into our circle. I haven't really had to go searching for friends, they always came to me.
As we talked tonight about the various paths that our friends took to reach UCM, I began to realize that the acronym UCM means so much more to others in the group. For many of them, UCM has been an oppurtunity to connect with true friends for the first time at Penn State, a place where they could finally stop searching. I'm beginning to realize that UCM does not have a single definition.
It's funny how you often learn more about leadership when you step out of it for a moment. I think that is the challenge for leaders; to have the ability to willingly "step out" of leadership. The ability to realize the worth and importance of the group they are leading is essential. And the importance of the group is only as good as the impact the group has had on its members.
As my time at Penn State is slowly winding up (scary to think that, but it is), I'm beginning to see how the hundreds of paths and connections have criss-crossed over the years. Many of them go off in a random direction and die out, but there are those few trails that lead to lasting friendships and experiences. It's nice to know that all along God has been weaving the important paths into my web.
This semester will mark my first semester as a non designated leader for UCM, the group I am apart of at Penn State. For the past three years, I have spent a good portion of my time working on starting up the group and creating activities that encouraged community-building. At the time, I thought I knew what community-building meant, but tonight made me look a few layers deeper at what the phrase means.
During the years as a "leader" for the group, I was consumed with the details of the organization: making sure there was food for the meetings, updating the website weekly (or more likely monthly), and ensuring that activities were designed to include everyone. And although we as a leadership team talked about the purpose of UCM and why this group was important for people on campus, I never took the time to really understand why.
I've had life pretty easy, and it is something I am extremely grateful for, but at the same time it is something that can set me up for missing the struggles that others have had to deal with in their own lives. I started thinking tonight about what the acronym UCM means for me. In my few years with the group, UCM has represented a leadership oppurtunity, a chance to create environments that bring people together, and a place to laugh. UCM is a place where my friends are, where I can relate to, where I can have fun with others.
However, I have always been UCM. I joined UCM before I was officially a freshman. When I joined the leadership team, there was no prior student UCM group, I was part of forming it out of nothing. Essentially, I was always there, and over the years others seem to gravitate to the group and become integrated into our circle. I haven't really had to go searching for friends, they always came to me.
As we talked tonight about the various paths that our friends took to reach UCM, I began to realize that the acronym UCM means so much more to others in the group. For many of them, UCM has been an oppurtunity to connect with true friends for the first time at Penn State, a place where they could finally stop searching. I'm beginning to realize that UCM does not have a single definition.
It's funny how you often learn more about leadership when you step out of it for a moment. I think that is the challenge for leaders; to have the ability to willingly "step out" of leadership. The ability to realize the worth and importance of the group they are leading is essential. And the importance of the group is only as good as the impact the group has had on its members.
As my time at Penn State is slowly winding up (scary to think that, but it is), I'm beginning to see how the hundreds of paths and connections have criss-crossed over the years. Many of them go off in a random direction and die out, but there are those few trails that lead to lasting friendships and experiences. It's nice to know that all along God has been weaving the important paths into my web.
Wow, another month has gone by and the blog has slightly gotten away from me. As I look back through my blog and read through some of the entries, it's hard not to notice how fast time goes by. Many of these entries I can remember where I was as I wrote them and what the situation was that caused me to write that entry. It's amazing how the days add. And I find it interesting the ratio I spend between thinking and doing during those days as they build upon one another.
My past behavior has shown that I tend to be a fan of attempting to cram as much activity and 'doing' into the time I have. I get antsy without a project. I find that 90% of the time I'm sitting around drumming on my thigh, stomach, steering wheel, pillow, keyboard, or sink; drumming along to some song stuck in my head. Lately, I've had a John Mayer song playing to the beats of my relentless drumming. The song is called "Say" and is quite simple. Repeated continually throughout the song is the line
Perhaps habit allows my activity to continue. Luckily one of my habits is music, and the lyrics behind them. I find that memorable moments and thoughts often arise due to hiccups among the habit. Music is always something happening as I think and do, but every now and then a song comes along which breaks my typical behavior because it contains some sort of hiccup. The song "Say" happened to be another one of those songs.
So I started thinking about what it was that I needed to say. Both to myself and others. So I started by going to youtube and began playing the song on repeat. After about the 50th time (ask Sauder, I played it a lot), the phrase "Jump with whole" began playing over and over in my head. To be honest, I didn't really know what it meant at first. But then it began to get clearer.
There's a lot currently going on in Spud World. With college graduation quickly approaching this december and the thought of deciding the next step, idea after idea seems to fly around within my head. Some sticking, others gone before I can remember them. And as I dwell over all the possibilities, I am reminded that regardless of the path chosen, the important first step is to jump with whole. A whole heart, a whole dream, and a whole focus.
On top of this, I have been doing a lot of thinking about friendships. From old friends to newer friends, from friends within projects to friends within family, from friends who you wish to spend every minute with to friends you are struggling to find the connecting thread. That's how my engineering brain began to work, splitting up groups of people to be classified within different 'friend groups.' And different people have different needs. The problem however is that I slowly began creating different ways of handling friendships among the different groups. Then 'jump with whole' started floating into every thought. Perhaps rather than spending the time analyzing the various befriending techniques per group, we should just jump with whole.
When I really think about it, I know what I should be doing with those connected to Spud World. Unfortunately, it tends to be extremely hard to just say what we need to say.
My past behavior has shown that I tend to be a fan of attempting to cram as much activity and 'doing' into the time I have. I get antsy without a project. I find that 90% of the time I'm sitting around drumming on my thigh, stomach, steering wheel, pillow, keyboard, or sink; drumming along to some song stuck in my head. Lately, I've had a John Mayer song playing to the beats of my relentless drumming. The song is called "Say" and is quite simple. Repeated continually throughout the song is the line
say what you need to sayIt took me nearly an entire day of unconscious drumming before I began thinking upon the lyrics. What was it that I needed to say. Sometimes my focus on 'doing' distracts me to the point that I forget to 'think' about the doing.
Perhaps habit allows my activity to continue. Luckily one of my habits is music, and the lyrics behind them. I find that memorable moments and thoughts often arise due to hiccups among the habit. Music is always something happening as I think and do, but every now and then a song comes along which breaks my typical behavior because it contains some sort of hiccup. The song "Say" happened to be another one of those songs.
So I started thinking about what it was that I needed to say. Both to myself and others. So I started by going to youtube and began playing the song on repeat. After about the 50th time (ask Sauder, I played it a lot), the phrase "Jump with whole" began playing over and over in my head. To be honest, I didn't really know what it meant at first. But then it began to get clearer.
There's a lot currently going on in Spud World. With college graduation quickly approaching this december and the thought of deciding the next step, idea after idea seems to fly around within my head. Some sticking, others gone before I can remember them. And as I dwell over all the possibilities, I am reminded that regardless of the path chosen, the important first step is to jump with whole. A whole heart, a whole dream, and a whole focus.
On top of this, I have been doing a lot of thinking about friendships. From old friends to newer friends, from friends within projects to friends within family, from friends who you wish to spend every minute with to friends you are struggling to find the connecting thread. That's how my engineering brain began to work, splitting up groups of people to be classified within different 'friend groups.' And different people have different needs. The problem however is that I slowly began creating different ways of handling friendships among the different groups. Then 'jump with whole' started floating into every thought. Perhaps rather than spending the time analyzing the various befriending techniques per group, we should just jump with whole.
When I really think about it, I know what I should be doing with those connected to Spud World. Unfortunately, it tends to be extremely hard to just say what we need to say.
you better know that in the endThis then reminds me of one other phrase which has been pasted to a wall beside my desk for the past few years. 'Love. Life is too short.'
it's better to say too much
than to never say what you need to say again
even if your hands are shaken
and your faith is broken
even as the eyes are closin
do it with a heart wide open
So it's day 2 of being back in the states and jet-lag has yet to hit me. I have spent every minute since I've been back working on compiling the video from the trip and I'll just say that it is quite spectacular. It's been great to work on all the video because it has allowed me to skim through all the places we visited really quickly, and it is just incredible how many sites we were able to see in our short time.
On the flight back from Jordan, I was able to request the very last row in the plane, and happily people-watched from my back seat for a good portion of the flight. Throughout three-quarters of the trip, one Jordanian kid entertained himself by walking up and down the aisles non-stop. When flight attendants would serve food, he would follow behind them. At night when people were sleeping, he would pretend to sneak past everyone in the dark. When people slowly began waking up, he picked up the speed and threw in a few sprints up and down the aisles. He was having a blast and was able to entertain himself for 12 hours in a plane.
As I sat there watching him race through the plane, I couldn't help but think that a kid is a kid, no matter what country or culture they grew up in. And their top priority is to have fun. When we were visiting a lot of the ancient ruins, we would frequently come across kids trying to sell postcards or rocks to the visitors. It was sad that these kids had to spend their days trying to make money from tourists, but then I watched more closely. And despite the fact that these kids were caught up in the tourism of their home, they still made sure to have fun. The little boys selling donkey rides in Petra would race back and forth on the dirt roads, laughing with one another as they went. As we walked by one of the many side stands selling jewelry, a mother and her 1 year old daughter sat to the side. The daughter was fascinated with the blue stone jewelry and kept trying different pieces on. She was by far more interested in it then many of the tourists, yet she probably spent most of her days sitting at that same stand looking at the same pieces. Driving from town to town, we saw numerous pick-up soccer games taking place on the side of the road, yet none relied on an actual net or ball. At a rest stop outside of Amman, three siblings were determined to mount an unusually tall see-saw in a little park. After numerous failed attempts, they resorted to the metal slide. Climbing up it backwards with their bare feet, we were amazed that their feet didn't burn.
And kids in Africa played the same games. In Australia and Jamaica as well. Kids are consistently kids, it's a nice common comfort when traveling between different cultures.
Perhaps I notice that kids are consistent because I've been one. I haven't exactly reached adult yet and I'm still finishing up being a student. Perhaps it's easier to pick common traits out after you've gone through that stage. Regardless, it's nice to know that there are still traits that can unite cultures. Sometimes it feels that people, or perhaps Americans, don't take the time to really understand and appreciate different cultures. It's easy to ignore parts of the rest of the world because we are isolated by oceans and make do in our own little section of earth. Yet Jordan was a completely different scenario, with so many countries surrounding its' borders, Jordanians had to have an understanding of many different cultures. I know that for me before the Jordan trip, I knew very little about Middle Eastern culture, it's amazing what 2.5 weeks in Jordan did.
One of the neat things about college today is that many of your friends end up traveling and studying in some other country. Although traveling to every country in the world would be an awesome accomplishment, the odds are slightly unlikely, so it's so nice to have friends report back and share about their experience. Share about the dress and the food and the customs and sports. To bring back pictures and stories. In doing so, I have been exposed to more cultures and countries than I would have ever guessed before coming to college. The next step is to take the lessons and appreciation learned from various people's travels, and apply them to our own lives and people within them. But that's another blog post...
On the flight back from Jordan, I was able to request the very last row in the plane, and happily people-watched from my back seat for a good portion of the flight. Throughout three-quarters of the trip, one Jordanian kid entertained himself by walking up and down the aisles non-stop. When flight attendants would serve food, he would follow behind them. At night when people were sleeping, he would pretend to sneak past everyone in the dark. When people slowly began waking up, he picked up the speed and threw in a few sprints up and down the aisles. He was having a blast and was able to entertain himself for 12 hours in a plane.
As I sat there watching him race through the plane, I couldn't help but think that a kid is a kid, no matter what country or culture they grew up in. And their top priority is to have fun. When we were visiting a lot of the ancient ruins, we would frequently come across kids trying to sell postcards or rocks to the visitors. It was sad that these kids had to spend their days trying to make money from tourists, but then I watched more closely. And despite the fact that these kids were caught up in the tourism of their home, they still made sure to have fun. The little boys selling donkey rides in Petra would race back and forth on the dirt roads, laughing with one another as they went. As we walked by one of the many side stands selling jewelry, a mother and her 1 year old daughter sat to the side. The daughter was fascinated with the blue stone jewelry and kept trying different pieces on. She was by far more interested in it then many of the tourists, yet she probably spent most of her days sitting at that same stand looking at the same pieces. Driving from town to town, we saw numerous pick-up soccer games taking place on the side of the road, yet none relied on an actual net or ball. At a rest stop outside of Amman, three siblings were determined to mount an unusually tall see-saw in a little park. After numerous failed attempts, they resorted to the metal slide. Climbing up it backwards with their bare feet, we were amazed that their feet didn't burn.
And kids in Africa played the same games. In Australia and Jamaica as well. Kids are consistently kids, it's a nice common comfort when traveling between different cultures.
Perhaps I notice that kids are consistent because I've been one. I haven't exactly reached adult yet and I'm still finishing up being a student. Perhaps it's easier to pick common traits out after you've gone through that stage. Regardless, it's nice to know that there are still traits that can unite cultures. Sometimes it feels that people, or perhaps Americans, don't take the time to really understand and appreciate different cultures. It's easy to ignore parts of the rest of the world because we are isolated by oceans and make do in our own little section of earth. Yet Jordan was a completely different scenario, with so many countries surrounding its' borders, Jordanians had to have an understanding of many different cultures. I know that for me before the Jordan trip, I knew very little about Middle Eastern culture, it's amazing what 2.5 weeks in Jordan did.
One of the neat things about college today is that many of your friends end up traveling and studying in some other country. Although traveling to every country in the world would be an awesome accomplishment, the odds are slightly unlikely, so it's so nice to have friends report back and share about their experience. Share about the dress and the food and the customs and sports. To bring back pictures and stories. In doing so, I have been exposed to more cultures and countries than I would have ever guessed before coming to college. The next step is to take the lessons and appreciation learned from various people's travels, and apply them to our own lives and people within them. But that's another blog post...
Today I turned 21, and the day brought with it quite a few awesome opportunities and experiences. We started the day off by visiting the location where John the Baptist baptized Jesus in the Jordan River. From here, we drove to the Dead Sea where we covered ourselves in mud from the water and then continued to float around on the salty water for part of the afternoon. Lunch was a buffet and for the first time this trip, they had a huge chocolate mousse cake as desert. After lunch we drove to a new camp ground for the night. Our tented village happens to be in the middle of a huge mountain valley. The only way to get to it is by a modified jeep which looks as if it was taken out of an Indiana Jones movie. Before dinner, we sprinted off into the rocks and Leah and I found a little nook where we were able to do some rock climbing which lead us to the top where we could see the sunset on the mountain ridges. After dinner, we came back outside and after resting in a Bedouin tent for a few minutes, we went back up to the rock ridge to watch the stars. I don’t know how I get so lucky that days like this happen to fall on my birthday, I was very grateful and in awe most of the day.
But the best part about today was that it got me thinking back to the summer one year ago. During my trip to Australia and Tanzania, I had a few songs that were continually stuck in my head, and wherever I went I ended up singing them to myself. As I was sitting on top of the white capped rocks blanketed by the stars above me, I started humming “Pure and Holy Passion” in my head. The one verse really caught me.
This world is empty, pale and poor
Compared to knowing you my Lord,
So lead me on and I will run after You
Lead me on and I will run after You.
So I started thinking about that line as I looked out over the hazy blackness. This world is empty, pale and poor. As we drive from site to site on this trip, we almost always have to drive through some type of desert or semi-arid landscape. The ground is dry and brown. An indecisive horizon blends from tan to blue all around me. The recent drought hasn’t helped, everything looks thirsty. These places that we are driving through are the exact places that the Israelites spent years wandering through in search of the promise land. I can see how they could have related to empty pale and poor. I wonder if I could have trusted God’s leading for forty years after being lead through such scourged regions.
As we were watching the stars tonight atop our rocky perch, we began thinking about the purpose of the stars. To think, that 3000 years ago there were people sitting most likely in the very place we were, staring up at the same sky, and wandering what it all meant. Here we are thousands of years later and doing the same thing. We were trying to determine the purpose of the stars. What made God decide to create these complex balls of gas light-years away from planet Earth?
The only thing I could think of was direction. God made the stars to lead his people. For thousands of years, stars have stayed in relatively the same position, and people over the years have used them for guidance and bearing. Do you think when God was creating stuff he thought, stars will be the easiest way to provide directions for these people. Or perhaps the complexity and intricateness of the stars is meant to show us that God’s leading doesn’t always tend to be simple or easy. Sometimes our paths that he leads us on are complex. And for me, when I see an easier solution (at least in my mind) I tend to lean towards that path. But I’ve been finding that God enjoys using complex paths to guide us. Sure there are times when the path is simple and easy to follow, but the majority of the time, the path is too hard to fully see. We sit and question why it has to be so intricate, just as I was thinking about the stars. If God wanted to, he could have just made a giant compass in the sky. That would have been easy.
But then there would have been no discovery. No awe. No questioning or learning.
As I climbed the side of one of the many rock formations scattered across the mountain valley and reached the top, I stood in awe for a few seconds over the view in front of me. It looked as if God had made those sand drip castles out of rock all over the ground. The mountain cliff emitted a soft red glow bouncing back from the setting sun. The birds took their final flights across the valley as they returned back to their nests for the night. A small beetle slowly maneuvered around some fallen debris, the rock side portraying a miniature Serengeti for him to explore. The bush to my side rustled as a lizard rearranged itself in the mess of thorns it beautifully produced. The rocks told a story. Their colored lines and shallow crevices told stories of the water, of their birth and of their growth. They sat in silence and talked to me. I wonder if 3000 years ago God painted the same picture from that rock cliff. What would have been different? What new awes would be laid out in front of me?
I’m finding that awe is a large part of God’s path, yet there are still times in my life that I forget to soak in the awe all around me. The last few weeks of school were a whirlwind to say the least. My projects and finals consumed most of me, and I slowly began to loose God’s awe in my work. People say I sometimes get lucky. I can’t really argue them. But I don’t think having all these things happen on my birthday was complete luck, sometimes God has important things to tell you and will therefore find ways to make his message known. Sometimes that message comes through awe-filled moments disguised as joyful moments. But sometimes the awe finds its place through tragic and unexpected moments. I’m still wrestling with this difference.
Yet what I have found out is that God talks to us continually. I believe that he wants to fill us with awe; this is why he created so many different and beautiful creations on the planet. I have had the privilege to see just a few of these places, and the common thread from every trip is the awe I’ve experienced. The challenge for me is how to discover the awe in my day to day routines. It’s there are looking back on my work I can see it. But it’s when you are in the moment and struggling over where God is working; those are the times when you desperately need to discover the awe.
So quick update for today, if you want a more thorough description of what we did check out the class blog. While we were talking at one of the local’s house, Sean started talking with the mother of the household. Now because Sean knows Arabic, we always let him go, because we never have any idea what he is saying. And usually he gets by without making too much of a fool of himself. But today he managed to nearly walk into a wedding. Somehow, his conversation with the mother quickly changed from wanting to become a diplomat to that he should marry one of her daughters. Sorry Hillary, it looks like Sean may have his eye on a Jordanian woman in the future. I bet his new brown eyes (Sean got contacts for his trip here so that he can blend in more with the locals) is what nearly settled the deal.
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